just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Randomize
