i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
