I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
