i just made my gag reflex go away.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
