So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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