rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
