Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Randomize
