Sponge bath it is.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Randomize
