the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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