Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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