so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
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