Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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