where am i from again
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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