He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
He's on the porch naked. Help.
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