Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Randomize
