ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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