i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize
