It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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