I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
