The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
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