Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
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