ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Randomize
