I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
