omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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