hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
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