Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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