Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(+93): View more from

dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this

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(706): View more from Georgia

i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"

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(817): View more from Texas

why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?

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(703): View more from Virginia

Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"

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(847): View more from Illinois

just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.

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(651): View more from Minnesota

the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days

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(913): View more from Kansas

I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.

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(702): View more from Nevada

Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair

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(914): View more from New York

Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?

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