Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I can't watch pbs sober anymore
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
nutella sex= disaster
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
