i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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