My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
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