Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize
