ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
