I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
