What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
