Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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