"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
I had to cum in my sink.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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