10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize