yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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