I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize