Please, let me fuck your mom
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Brb crying the tears of my youth
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize
