I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
Randomize
