The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
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