i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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