My sheets look like a crime scene.
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
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