what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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