you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
