am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Randomize
