I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
