batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Randomize
