You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
Randomize
